So, When Are You Done?

“When is your last treatment?”

“How much longer do you have to do this?”

“How many more treatments do you have?”

“So, when are you done?”

I look into the imploring eyes of my questioner, and I wish I had a better answer.  But the truth is, only God knows.  What I usually say is “Never, or until the Lord calls me home, or until there’s a cure, or until the Rapture (which is what I am praying for).”  It’s a little jolting for them to hear.  Most people who know someone with cancer have heard they are on a set treatment plan, with beginning and end dates.  Those people are most likely not in Stage IV.  There is still hope for their cancer to go into remission and for them to be cured.  

Once the cancer metastasizes and learns how to spread to other areas of the body, you are in Stage IV.  Your treatment plans change from ‘Curative’ to ‘Palliative’.  You’re just trying to stay one step ahead of the cancer with different treatments, which hopefully work long enough to kill whatever tumors have started growing yet again since your last type of treatment.  Unfortunately, the cancer eventually learns how to outsmart each kind of treatment as you serve them up.  You may have a few gloriously clear PET scans in a row and then…there are new areas of concern.  In my case, one or more lymph nodes are enlarged and showing hyper metabolic activity (a sign of cancerous growth).  At that point, your oncologist digs into his or her bag of tricks to find a new, different treatment to try:  combinations of chemo infusions or pills, immunotherapy infusions, etc.  Results of clinical trials and various studies may point to a promising path forward for a time.  Eventually, you reach the end of the road.  There are no new treatments to try.  You may be able to go full circle and return to the original treatment you used when you were first diagnosed.  I am now on the last known treatment for my type of cancer.  If and when it stops working, unless a new treatment emerges onto the scene, I will probably return to my original treatment from 2022 and pray that this cancer has morphed so many times that it doesn’t recognize it and can’t fight back…for a time.      

As my oncologist told me the third time my cancer returned, we’re buying time.  Time for a new treatment to come along.  Time for a cure to be announced.  Time for me to make more wonderful memories with my husband, friends, and family.  Time to serve the Lord however He asks. 

Next time you’re speaking with someone who is battling cancer and you don’t already know what stage they’re in, you may want to ask them.  I don’t think most people in that situation would mind.  It shows you are concerned.  If they are somewhere in Stages I-III, they are most likely in a treatment plan with some kind of end date.  I’ve had chemo treatments lasting from four to six months, and radiation/chemo combo plans lasting four to six weeks.  At the end of these treatments, you usually get to ring a bell or bang a gong to celebrate.  It is a joyous noise!  You can let them know you will be praying for them as they count down the days.

If they are in Stage IV, they are probably on a ‘maintenance’ treatment, a  continuous schedule of chemo, immunotherapy, and/or other treatments to battle the cancer and buy time.  Those of us who have been battling for years may also need bone marrow stimulation shots to give our worn-out bodies a boost in production of white blood cells and neutrophils to join the front line of the war.  You can let them know you will pray for endurance and strength as they continue to fight.

And, of course, if an opportunity arises to share the Gospel with someone fighting cancer who doesn’t yet know Jesus, obey the Holy Spirit as He leads you.  I can’t imagine going through this without Him, and offering that hope to someone who is walking the cancer journey alone would be a very loving thing to do.      

So, when am I done?  When the Lord says I’m done.  I trust in Him completely and know that His plan for my life is perfect, and He will take me home at the perfect time.  Meanwhile, I choose to see every day as a gift, serve Him by trying to love people and shine His light into this darkening world, and keep my eyes focused on Jesus, the author and finisher of my faith, my Lord and Savior.